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Joystiq presents

The reveal!

zOMG!Tracing the fiend into the back alley, you find that he has nowhere to go. You've got him now! He holds his hands up in surrender. You smugly walk over and taser that bitch, because he was pissing you off. Well done.

But who was the grievous offender? You rip off the trenchcoat and ... oh my God.

It's ... it's DS Lite!

"How could you," you scream in agony! "You were my friend, my brother through all those boring months in the academy!"

"I'm ... I'm sorry kid. They wanted me so bad ... I guess the power went to my head. But your taser put out my pixels for good, kid. It's ... it's over for me. Do one last thing for me, kid, just one thing ..."

"Anything," you say, tears welling up.

"Slap ... slap Jack Thompson in the face. Really hard. For me."

THE END!

- DS Lite: 201,378 72,757 (56.57%)
- Playstation 3: 32,662 9,437 (22.42%)
- PSP: 30,815 14,125 (84.63%)
- PS2: 26,263 11,195 (74.30%)
- Xbox 360: 7,007 2,957 (73.01%)
- GBA SP: 1,26465 (5.42%)
- Game Boy Micro: 1,235 198 (19.09%)
- Gamecube: 576 62 (12.06%)
- DS Phat: 212 30 (16.48%)
- GBA: 27 3 (10.00%)
- Xbox: 0 6 (100.00%)

[Source: Media Create

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Reader Comments

(Page 1)

1. LMAO thats the best one i've ever seen!

Posted at 8:55PM on Dec 1st 2006 by phipps

2. Wow. The comment counter is quite broken though.

Posted at 10:31PM on Dec 1st 2006 by O_o

3. "P.S.: For future reference, you may avoid these confirmations by using your e-mail and password:"

Where do i input the password? There're only 3 rows, name/email/URL?

Posted at 10:32PM on Dec 1st 2006 by O_o

4. Hahaha... holy crap Jason, you made the hardware sales entertaining! Well done!

Posted at 11:38PM on Dec 1st 2006 by CJC

5. O_o,
That feature is for Engadget only, atm.

Also, good luck topping this on your next entry Jason! Bravo.

Posted at 12:47AM on Dec 2nd 2006 by Ritz

6. Well done, and I second what Ritz said. Looking forward to the next one ;)

Posted at 8:08AM on Dec 2nd 2006 by Reeve

7. Now that's better!

(Stupid car chase.)

Posted at 8:40AM on Dec 2nd 2006 by strider_mt2k

8. HAHAHA! Holy crapper, man! I miss those books, and now they, I think, came out with DVD versions of these or something. I wish someone would make one of these for the DS, now that I think about it. Either way, awesome post, yo! I actually did the whole spinning around thing while singing Like a Virgin... hahaha, great times.

Posted at 10:44AM on Dec 2nd 2006 by JBGUY2K

9. Wow, that was great, those books were awesome. Any reason why the DS jumped to 200K? Ah well, probably last week with the DS on top, now that Wii is launching in Japan.

Posted at 1:13PM on Dec 3rd 2006 by Ibrahim

10. I know why.
The DS is the coolest thing since the Game Boy itself.

There, I said it.

Posted at 8:41AM on Dec 4th 2006 by strider_mt2k

11. ohh my god im so i love with that article. best ever

Posted at 6:47PM on Dec 6th 2006 by Robby

12. Yay, marred pedestrians! Taking the stupid rout is ALWAYS rewarding in Choose-Your-Owns.

Posted at 12:48AM on Dec 30th 2006 by Arbuz Chokaro

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