Gaming sites are inundated with holiday gift guides at the end of the year, listing the best and most popular games that everyone pretty much already has (or knows about). Well, we're not going in for that this year. Our gift guide will help you find the best gifts in categories the other sites won't cover -- because we just made them up.

My secret addiction -- the one that has me wearing only long-sleeved shirts and brushing my teeth before coming home, all to hide its telling signs -- is stylus collecting. I can't get enough of these pen-shaped bits of plastic; I'm cuckoo for them, you could say. Every time I make a Play Asia purchase or collect a preorder bonus, I feel like I've lost another part of me, another vital fragment I'll never have again. I don't know what it feels like to be alive anymore.

I've long moved on from conventional styli, using anything I can get my anxious, shaking hands on, the crazier the better. How else do you think I managed to put together this gift guide for alternative styli? Thumb styli, extendable styli, styli with colorful mascots on them -- you name it, I've tried every single one of them, and they don't do a damn thing for me anymore. Forget about those nonsense accessories and read on for my NSFW roundup of styli presents that will change your life ... for the worse. Joys be thine, suckas.