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DS Daily: Register your name

This morning, our friend and colleague Alisha is off gifting the world with the very latest DS Fanboy: a new consumer with nearly endless need for training, and for whom every control scheme is novel. In other words, a baby infant. We'd like to extend premature (as of writing time) congratulations!

The impending baby got us thinking about video games, as we desperately try to make things do. Specifically, game-related baby names. Everyone reading this blog is a huge nerd, and nerds do things like naming things after game characters. What's your hard drive's volume label? What's your cat's name?

We wonder if there's anyone out there bold enough, or disinterested enough in the kid's well-being, to have given their offspring a game character name, or to plan to do so in the future. Any baby Luigis out there? Otacon? Marth? Diddy? Agent Chieftain? Lolo? Phoenix? How about a Samus? Zangief? Vic Viper? Pyramid Head? Gas-O? Corn? Waiter Skeleton? Heat Man? Two-P?

Somebody please name a kid Zangief.

DS may have killed the 'Game Boy' name

We all suspected that the Game Boy Advance was basically moribund, because it lacks the high-tech money-printing capabilities of the DS. Confirming our suspicions, Shigeru Miyamoto mentioned in an interview with Kotaku that Nintendo basically didn't care about the platform anymore.

Now, according to George Harrison, it's not just Nintendo's "third pillar" strategy that's out, but the whole Game Boy line. He told GameDaily that "This year in our marketing you really won't see much push against Game Boy itself, so it will kind of seek its own level. It's hard to say in the future if we will ever bring back the Game Boy trademark."

It makes sense for Nintendo not to bring back the Game Boy name when the DS has so much momentum. But, personally, we think it's quite sad to see a Nintendo standard go away. Oh, well, at least we've got the Wii now to take over as the most awkwardly-named Nintendo console on the market.

DS Daily: Those pesky names

Stupid names. Who needs 'em? We never did. Growing up, we never talked about moblins or lynel in The Legend of Zelda. We talked about the spear dudes and those stupid #*@&$^) centaur guys (except with more colorful metaphors). We were dirty, dirty children who shouldn't have been allowed to mix with the other children. But the point is, manual-reading aside, the official names for creatures in video games just never seemed to stick with us. Oh, maybe some (evil) people could summon the precise names for Lakitus and Metools, but we were not those people.

This is why we like Castlevania. You know what a Fish Head is? It's a freakin' fish-headed monster. Even we can remember that. But what about you?

Japanese Hardware Sales: 29 Jan - 4 Feb: Executive assistant edition

He'll KILL YOUDon't lie, faithful readers. Each and every one of you, upon reading this article, indulged in at least four seconds of consideration on applying for the position of Reggie Fils-Aime's personal assistant. The list of technical requirements was steep, but when you consider the amount of people willing to take this job is approximately 6.5 billion, there are certainly a few out there who fit the bill.

Reggie personally kicks all those asses that are so frequently mentioned. But those names he's taken? He merely dictates them to that special person, whose job it is to transcribe the taken names for future reference. Truly, a job of monumental importance.

A little known fact, friends, is that Reggie has a direct impact on the Japanese hardware sales numbers every week. Here is an example conversation, heard behind the closed doors of his secret penthouse office...

Reggie Fils-Aime: We need to come up with some interesting numbers this week.

Assistant: Sir, they have the actual data available in Japan, if we just--

Reggie: Silence!

Assistant: ...

Reggie: ...

Assistant: If you wan--

Reggie then rips out the assistant's spine in retribution.

- DS Lite: 146,073 48,453 (24.91%)
- Wii: 65,740 18,014 (21.51%)
- PSP: 31,216 4,484 (12.56%)
- PS2: 18,727 1,269 (6.35%)
- PS3: 17,540 3,455 (16.46%)
- Xbox 360: 6,130 1,235 (16.77%)
- Game Boy Micro: 1,050 127 (10.79%)
- GBA SP: 724 299 (29.23%)
- Gamecube: 306 41 (11.82%)
- DS Phat: 119 37 (45.12%)
- GBA: 28 6 (17.65%)

[Source: Media Create]

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