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Posts with tag Hardware

Man lays into DS microphone, we leap to heroic defense

Over at Next-Gen, Ben Reich has penned an article on the worst ideas to hit gaming, with two Nintendo creations in his choices. The first, Friend Codes, we can kind of roll with. They're unwieldy, awkward, and let's face it: there are better solutions.

Perhaps they deserve to be there, but the DS's microphone? Not so much. See, we quite like the mic. OK, it's not as widely used as other parts of the handheld's unique feature-set, but we're struggling to swallow the argument that it's one of "gaming's worst ever ideas." Not in a world where the Roll & Rocker exists.

Two things seem to irk Reich about the DS's mic: that it can be embarrassing to use in public, and that not enough game developers have used it well. We partially agree with his first point -- e-nun-ci-at-ing "Buh-loo!" into your handheld while on the bus to work would make most people feel like a bit of a nugget. Then again, nobody is forcing you to play such games in public. It's all a question of choosing an appropriate location.

Secondly, plenty of games find a good use for the microphone. Being able to yell "Objection!" just before you start dismantling your rival in the Ace Attorney games is a fantastic touch! Summoning your hound in Nintendogs with a whistle or a shout of their name is equally nifty. My French Coach, which Alisha is covering all this week, makes terrific use of the microphone, allowing users to record themselves, in a bid to achieve greater fluency.

In other words, Mr Reich, we're going to have to politely disagree with you.

Nintendo won't stop making hardware

Sure, it may be a while before some new Nintendo hardware comes along, but according to Nintendo's president Satoru Iwata, the company will never dedicate itself to only making software.

Iwata was asked if the company would consider giving up on its hardware, as changes and additions to cell phones are making other portable devices irrelevant. He responded, "Nintendo is clearly much stronger when we can combine both hardware and software development than when we have to focus on software. I just cannot think of any reason why we would abandon a weapon which brings us such a great advantage. I just cannot imagine Nintendo's future as a dedicated software content provider."

Iwata also said that there is room for both the DS and mobile phones in the market, and therefore the two won't have to merge together. So, never fear folks. Even when if cell phones do take over the world, Nintendo will keep chugging out hardware for us all as long as you keep on buying it.

[Via Aussie-Nintendo]

Sears Black Friday ad reveals two new DS Lites


The annual pre-"Black Friday" bargain hunting has started among predatory shoppers, and we're already reaping the benefits of shoppers' insane vigilance. This detail from a Sears ad has revealed two new DS hardware configurations. We already knew of the gold Phantom Hourglass box, but this is the firmest confirmation we've seen from an actual retailer.

More interesting is the reveal of a metallic pink Nintendogs: Best Friends Edition bundle for $149.99. We don't know if this is a Sears exclusive, but the little ad clipping makes no mention of exclusivity. We doubt it, since one of our intrepid commenters hinted at exactly this hardware for GameStop as well. A new hardware bundle for a two-year-old game? Seems ludicrous on the outset, but it'll probably sell a (few million) bundle(s).

[Thanks, Steve 3.2!]

US gamers get Really Cool Color Spotting Training [update 1]


If you're in the US, and you've ever thought of listening to Alisha and upgrading to a Lite, next month would be a good time to do it. A listing for the black/red DS Lite with an included copy of Brain Age 2 has shown up on Gamestop for $149.99, which is unfortunately not a price break at all. It also doesn't come with a carrying case like the Canadian bundle does.

We're confident enough in the awesomeness of the Brain Age 2 edition DS Lite that we can recommend it even against future color schemes. We always wanted the Boktai GBA SP, and now here it is as a DS! It may even fit in the Boktai coffin case.

[Update: The listing appears to have been removed! The same thing happened last time with Futureshop. You're just going to have to trust us. We totally saw it. It's totally real.]

Japanese hardware sales, Jun. 4 - Jun. 10: Harry Potter edition

BUY THIS BOOK FOOLZThe final release of Harry Potter, one of the most widespread, wonderful literary series ever written, is coming to a close come July 21st. We'd like to take a moment and salute J. K. Rowling for reintroducing the better part of a world to the joys of reading, because hey, if no one read, we'd be out of our jobs. Pick up Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows as soon as you can, guys. Trust us.

Harry Potter and the Japanese Hardware Sales

"Harry," said Ron, slightly out of breath, "Snape'll go nutters if we're late again. Remember what he did to Neville?"

"Yeah," replied Harry, throwing himself down a shifting staircase and sprinting through the corridors. Snape had used a particularly nasty hex on the frequently tardy Neville, turning his hands into N-Gages. Harry allowed himself a momentary shudder.

They rounded a corner and began the descent into Snape's dungeon of a classroom, Harry's least favorite place at Hogwarts. Even disregarding his immense dislike of Severus Snape, Harry had never had much of a knack for Potions; it was always his lowest grade of the term.

Continue reading Japanese hardware sales, Jun. 4 - Jun. 10: Harry Potter edition

May NPD: the N stands for Nintendo


... and the P stands for Pokémon. The May NPD numbers are out, and-- no surprise-- the DS came out on top yet again. The Wii also did quite well, probably exactly as well as it could have given the supplies.
  • Nintendo DS: 423K
  • Nintendo Wii: 338K
  • Sony PSP: 221K
  • Sony PlayStation 2: 187K
  • Microsoft Xbox 360: 155K
  • Sony PlayStation 3: 81K
There were only two DS games on the software chart this month, and they're basically one game.
  • Pokémon Diamond (DS)
  • Mario Party 8 (Wii)
  • Spider-Man 3 (PS2)
  • Pokémon Pearl (DS)
  • Wii Play w/remote (Wii)
  • Forza Motorsport 2 (Xbox 360)
  • Guitar Hero II w/guitar (Xbox 360)
  • Spider-Man 3 (Xbox 360)
  • Command & Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars (Xbox 360)
  • Guitar Hero II w/guitar (PS2)
Good for those other consoles for having so many games on the list this month. They try so hard. God bless' em.

Japanese hardware sales, May 28 - Jun. 3: Explanatory Aqua Teen edition

FROM THE PASTWe know, you were disappointed. Last night, as you happily refreshed DS Fanboy every nine seconds or so looking for this week's Japanese hardware sales, the vim slowly faded from your eyes as the hours ticked into oblivion. We would never willingly deprive our readers so; we were unavoidably delayed! You see ....

Thousands of years ago, before the dawn of man as we knew him ... there were the moon men, reigning over the Earth. But this was not the Earth you knew! It was covered in jelly and high-density motor oil, making the planet very slippery. The moon men blamed the corporations, and there was a war and many were killed. The battle raged for millennia until 8000 A.D., when the moon men realized they were not actually from the moon, but from rural Pennsylvania. They then built a monument to the moon but then the Quakers stole it and filled it with oatmeal, and no one knew what flavor. Californians were highly displeased and turned all the Quakers invisible, which is why you never see them anymore. And that ... is where babies come from.

- DS Lite: 123,140 4,321 (3.39%)
- Wii: 69,748 11,104 (18.93%)
- PSP: 26,358 261 (1.00%)
- PS2: 11,814 503 (4.45%)
- PS3: 8,998 629 (6.53%)
- Xbox 360: 2,219 175 (8.56%)
- Game Boy Micro: 310 97 (23.83%)
- GBA SP: 247 41 (14.24%)
- Gamecube: 226 30 (11.72%)
- DS Phat: 71 10 (12.35%)
- GBA: 16 1 (5.88%)

[Source: Media Create]

Japanese hardware sales, May 21 - May 27: Step by Step edition

Only four, not twelve.Some of our readers wonder exactly what they're supposed to do with the Japanese hardware sales every week. To promote enlightenment and worldwide harmony, we've taken the liberty of creating a step-by-step walkthrough of a proper response to the weekly figures. Adhere to these rules whenever possible, and if you must deviate, remember to at least properly remove all semblance of standard English grammar from your comments.

1. Look for any obvious outliers in the sales data, such as the Nintendo DS falling out of first place. This will never occur; advance to step 2.

2. Statistical variation causes slight fluctuations every week. Immediately look for numbers that come close to dividing evenly into one another; this enables comments such as, "lol, wii sold 5x of PS3s this week, pwnage."

3. Should any Nintendo systems suffer a decrease in sales, come up with reasons as to why they dropped. The usually accurate "supply is unable to currently meet demand" excuse is no longer sufficient in most cases. Come up with creative replies like, "redirected shipments of software caused a temporary instability in the retail market," or "lol ghost of kutaragi put a curse on teh DS kekekekeke."

4. There will invariably be a Sony or Microsoft troll, defending his or her own system while attacking your own. Henceforth, we'll be posting IP addresses and relevant contact information*; please take it upon yourselves to attack and/or maim the aforementioned troll, preferably with some kind of mace that grants +7 strength while fighting trolls.

*Really.**

- DS Lite: 127,461 16,248 (14.61%)
- Wii: 58,644 6,451 (12.36%)
- PSP: 26,097 1,408 (5.12%)
- PS2: 11,311 430 (3.95%)
- PS3: 9,627 968 (11.18%)
- Xbox 360: 2,044 18 (0.89%)
- Game Boy Micro: 407 21 (4.91%)
- GBA SP: 288 42 (12.73%)
- Gamecube: 256 20 (7.25%)
- DS Phat: 81 55 (211.54%)
- GBA: 17 16 (48.48%)

[Source: Media Create]

**Not really.

Japanese hardware sales, May 14 - May 20: Satisfactory edition

Um...hot?
Having issues with performance? Can't seem to keep those sales numbers up? Disappointed in your ability to satisfy Japanese schoolchildren? It's okay, Mr. Miyamoto. It's not you, it's just ... you know ... they've seen it all before. They want something new. They need something big, and yours just isn't big enough. But boy, do we have a product for you!

Trust us. With regular use comes a guaranteed increase in size, or your money back! Girls will flock to you, women will be putty in your hands! After all, we've seen the results firsthand. Yes, that's right, we've sunk quite a bit of our own money and time into this product, and we're just absolutely 100% positive you'll start seeing results within a few weeks. And hey, it's not your fault nature didn't give you a little more to work with! So go ahead and start Training Your Brain, Miyamoto-san, and give those women what they really want: your astronomically high IQ.

- DS Lite: 111,213 52,572 (32.10%)
- Wii: 52,193 351 (0.67%)
- PSP: 27,505 6,928 (20.12%)
- PS2: 10,881 467 (4.48%)
- PS3: 8,659 180 (2.04%)
- Xbox 360: 2,026 79 (3.75%)
- Game Boy Micro: 428 20 (4.90%)
- GBA SP: 330 13 (3.79%)
- Gamecube: 276 39 (12.38%)
- GBA: 33 15 (83.33%)
- DS Phat: 26 13 (33.33%)

[Source: Media Create]

Japanese hardware sales, May. 7 - May 13: Office Space edition

Loadletter beatdown
David: Hey, Jason, yeahhhh, I'm gonna need you to get on those JHS reports ... did you see the memo?

Jason: Uh, yeah, I saw it. Thanks, Dave.

David: Good, good. I'll let you get to it, then.

(Jason sighs, and begins to type frantically.)

Alisha: Heyyyyy, Jason, did you see the mem--

Jason: For the love of God, yes. I'm on it.

Alisha: No need to snap, Jason. Sounds like someone has a case of the Fridays.

(Jason mumbles as Alisha walks away. JC and Eric approach.)

JC: I can't believe it. I told those fudgepackers I liked JC's music. Me! I've never despised any form of sensory input as I do those songs.

Continue reading Japanese hardware sales, May. 7 - May 13: Office Space edition

Japanese hardware sales, Apr. 30 - May 6: Deja vu edition

It's like a koala crapped a rainbow in my brain!I see you're back, kid. No surprise there. You've hit the rarest of the rare candies, and Level 100 wasn't enough for you? You're flying high for awhile, but then even that's not enough. Believe me, I know.

So let me tell you what's I've got here, kid. I call it shine. I have to grow 8,192 plants just to make one of these little pills, but kid, you've never seen a Psywave like this. It makes you stronger, faster, hell, even your skin changes color. It's luxury, it's lightning ....

So, you wanna score some--whoa, whoa, not so fast, kid! Last time was a freebie, a little icing before the cake. I'm gonna need something more than just sales charts. I'm gonna need some sort of tripped-up magical cartoon dream sequence ... no, make that two tripped up cartoon dream sequences. Oh, baby, yes. I am rollin'.

Don't forget those charts, too, kid, and remember ... you'll be back ...

- DS Lite: 285,123 29,152 (11.39%)
- Wii: 101,320 1,202 (1.17%)
- PSP: 35,172 1,312 (3.87%)
- PS2: 14,815 2,231 (17.73%)
- PS3: 12,974 183 (1.43%)
- Xbox 360: 3,205 43 (1.36%)
- Gamecube: 394 227 (135.93%)
- Game Boy Micro: 340 290 (46.03%)
- GBA SP: 302 193 (38.99%)
- DS Phat: 69 23 (25.00%)
- GBA: 11 11 (Trippin%)

[Source: Media Create]

(... it's signed by Fatal1ty ...)

Unofficial stat line: DS sales surpass GBA in Japan

It's a party at my house.
Certainly, Japan's Golden Week is a triumphant one for Nintendo. The top nineteen titles in software belong to the House That Mario Built, as well as 82% of combined hardware sales. Still, one incredible milestone stands out among the fanfare: according to unofficial numbers, the DS has now officially outsold the powerhouse Game Boy Advance in Japan, 16,913,437 to 16,682,376.

It's important to note that these numbers differ slightly from our standard Media Create sales figures used in our regular edition posts. Furthermore, if the news is indeed true, we're sure Nintendo will send out a press release soon enough, touting their own brilliance and humanitarianism. They just love those things.

Japanese hardware sales, Apr. 23 - 29: Double feature edition



Due to the holiday week in Japan, the sales numbers were a little slow, but now they're here ... and so, without further ado, we present the following commercial script.

[AUDIO ]
It's called the DS, or the handheld system that dared to put two screens of uncensored, hardcore action into the hands of gamers.

[VIDEO]
EXTREME CLOSE-UP ON BOTTOM SCREEN. PULL BACK TO SHOW ENTIRE DS.]

[AUDIO]
Iwata and Miyamoto are back, only this time, they're back to back with dual screens that will tear you in two.

[VIDEO]
CUT TO CARTOON MIYAMOTO AND IWATA PORTRAIT.

Continue reading Japanese hardware sales, Apr. 23 - 29: Double feature edition

Japanese hardware sales, Apr. 16 - Apr. 22: Civil War edition

I wrote it. Back in 1862.Camp Lincoln Keokuk Iowa
October the 23rd, 1862
To Miss Dorothy W. Sullivan

My darling Dorothy,

I will inform you that I am well at this time, in this God Forsaken regiment. Lest I should not be able to write you again, I feel impelled to write lines that may fall under your eye when I am to be no more. Death is coming, Dorothy, I can feel its stench in the blood-soaked battlefields on which we stand, in the eyes of my comrades as they see the fallen friends who once laughed and drank alongside.

Would I were back with you, dear Dorothy, that all happiness should come to us as it once did. My country hath borne me on these winds away from you, and unseeing with my one eye 'gainst your two, I tread as they so commanded. Your bright smile still warms me as I lay in drought, and those who would care care not about me, and those who do not pay as much mind as they did.

My forefathers have fallen, and yours live strong; our children might not remember the lineage which I bestow. O Dorothy! Do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again.

- Percy Sullivan

- DS Lite: 172,359 39,034 (29.28%)
- Wii: 77,913 2,154 (2.84%)
- PSP: 29,459 4,609 (18.55%)
- PS2: 11,398 1,474 (11.45%)
- PS3: 11,000 948 (7.93%)
- Xbox 360: 2,307 593 (20.45%)
- GBA SP: 860 206 (31.50%)
- Game Boy Micro: 449 168 (27.23%)
- Gamecube: 266 99 (59.28%)
- DS Phat: 81 65 (44.52%)
- GBA: 55 29 (111.54%)

[Source: Media Create]

Japanese hardware sales, Apr. 9 - Apr. 15: 433420-302039 Edition

Do you have one?"You n00b sunnuva bitch," said the legendary knight 3494-5541-9771. "Pwnage ... is inevitable."

"Hah!" said his adversary, 7111-9463-2931. "If you wish to grok your princess once more, you'll taste the fury of my skillz!" He raised his arms high in the air. "363171-765491, I summon thee from the shades of hell! Rise forth and rock this bitch!"

The ground shook, and from a spewing chasm came the beast, hideous and deformed. 3494-5541-9771 stood his ground. No creature would keep him from his princess. He dodged a 7612-8113-4353-1919 and drew his 1913-1564-8328, shining in the darkness. With one deft blow he severed the 363171-765491's head, and leapt toward 7111-9463-2931.

"Boom--" shouted 7111-9463-2931, raising his staff. The two collided--

"HEADSHOTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!"

And all was silent. 3494-5541-9771 had won. He sheathed his 1913-1564-8328 and approached his beautiful princess, 654232-918811. Her eyes fluttered open.

"Did you ... did you pwn him?"

"I did, fair princess."

"Well done, knight. And now, your just reward..."She slowly began to disrobe...

"Wait," she said suddenly. "Do I have your Friend Code?"

"What? I don't need your friend co--"

"Sorry, sweetie," said 654232-918811, donning her gown once more. "No code, no multiplayer." She walked away.

"I ... but ... FRAK!"

(Seriously, Nintendo. This crap is ridiculous.)

- DS Lite: 133,325 22,480 (20.28%)
- Wii: 75,759 23,176 (44.08%)
- PSP: 24,850 6,653 (21.12%)
- PS2: 12,872 1,362 (9.57%)
- PS3: 11,948 2,572 (17.71%)
- Xbox 360: 2,900 63 (2.13%)
- GBA SP: 654 179 (21.49%)
- Game Boy Micro: 617 105 (20.51%)
- Gamecube: 167 88 (34.51%)
- DS Phat: 146 56 (62.22%)
- GBA: 26 14 (116.67%)

[Source: Media Create]

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